Tuesday, 6 December 2011

An Evening Chat

My friends are scattered throughout the world. I know no one in the city in which I was born and brought up, went to school and uni and worked until I was 26 and left.  A friend recently said that when her friend left the village in which they both lived "I could leave here now. She was part of what made this village home. Su hogar fue mi hogar. These are the ties that bind us.  And in a way that is difficult to define, I feel alone again.".  And I knew how she felt.

When we went to Lewis in the '70s we left 450 miles behind the life we had made for ourselves, our friends and our families.  We forged new lives with new friends.

I stayed on the Island.  Most of the friends I made in those formative years have left even though many have remained very close friends.  There are times when I have felt alone again.  And then new people have arrived and new friendships have been forged.

And now I have deserted them for six months of each year.

In fact because my friends are scattered throughout the world I have become used to keeping in touch by all sorts of means in this age of easy communication.

But this evening as I was about to do something or other Wendy came down to bring me the mail she had collected from the mailbox and to have a chat.  Several hours and several glasses of conviviality later she poddled off back up the lane home.

And the above words came back to me.  And I understood what she meant with a new clarity.  There is nothing like sharing words face to face.


  1. This put me in a strange mood. My world has both shrunk and grown in the past few years. Fewer friends in the tangible world. More on the internet. Another one is about to move from the face-to-face world into the computer. (To Australia actually, but...)

  2. Now you know how I feel, when one of my best friends walks out on me every 6 months and then returns 6 months later. Then daughter goes away for 6 months and is back for 5 weeks and then away again for 6 months and so it goes on and on and..... Still as long as everyone is happy then that is fine by me.

  3. I have family very close by that we only see one another every few months or so. My brother lives with my father and I only see him now and again. My daddy, though...he lives a few towns over but we get together at least once a week if not more.

    Friends...I have many, but those close enough to know me from top to bottom are not always face to face. We may be miles apart but in the heart, they remain close by.

  4. Yes, Monica, it's strange how something that we (I at least) could not have imagined 20 or even 10 years ago has now become a very real way of life for many of us.

    Pat, I do understand. There are moments when I feel the separation very much but somehow I've learned to cope with it. Possibly, I think, by just not allowing it to be 'separated' from my friends and refusing to allow it to think that way. Sometimes, however, emotion just takes over. C'est la vie.

    Heather what you say is very true. I know some people I have never met better than I know some people I've 'known' for years in the flesh.

  5. I have brothers that are far from me most of the time. I certainly know that the connection is still there. None of us are very good at frequent comment, erhaps due to our family's dynamic, but that doesn't mean that we're not important to one another. Family.

    It's funny, I have friends with that same kind of connection. I have no idea what that speaks about our friendships, but it works. They are like family too.

  6. Yes Lisa I find that some people don't have contact all the time but when they do catch up it's as if they've never been apart.